I’d like to take a moment to talk about one of my hobbies. Not writing, which is my vocation. Not karate, which is a do. Not even gardening, since the only garden I have at the moment is a single basil plant due to landlord policy.

No, I have a hobby. I don’t expect it to ever make me any money, I don’t think I’m much good at it now and though I hack at it now and again, I don’t think I’m going to get much better at it. It’s just something I like to do because I find it fun.

So what is it? The Secret Vice. Or, rather, the Not-So-Secret Vice. I invent languages for fun.

(I used to put it “I make model languages in a bottle,” but let’s be honest, “The Secret Vice” sounds so much cooler.)

Right now I’m tinkering with a language family I collectively refer to as Rosoc (though, like Tolkien, I have a second, related subfamily, Lailesh). I’m still working on the Neolithic proto-Rosoc that births both languages. They’re built like Semitic languages, like Hebrew and Arabic, with triconsonental roots representing broad ideas (K-T-B in Arabic is everything to do with writing/books/bureaus/offices for example). These roots get conjugated/declined with different vowel combinations and then further modified with prefixes, affixes, and infixes, like more familiar Indo-European languages.

When I get to the writing system, I’m going to base it on the Chinese model, with radicals for basic ideas modified with phonemic elements. In written Chinese, some 90% of the hanzi are made up of these two elements together: the radical to tell you what the word is about, the phonetic to tell you what it sounds like. Marrying the Semitic radicals to the Chinese radicals was, in fact, the inspiration for this whole project.

But right now, I’m having fun adding words to the lexicon (and getting some inventive derivations – the word for “playing together” is “puppy-ing” for example), working out a grammar, and, of course, translations. I worked up some proverbs and maxims and have translated these, though I fully expect these translations to be obsolete as Proto-Rosoc becomes more finished.


Edgānāmhe dő-tūkhab edgirlab dő-řūmh’bab.

edgānā-mhedő-tūkheedgirlabdő-řūmh’bab
əd̪gæɳæmʰəd̪ʌɳt̪ɯkʰəəd̪giɾ̼l̪abd̪ʌɳɹɯmʰbab
feast.MASC.ERG-PLGEN--husband.GEN--MASC.SINGpeace.ABS--FEM.SINGGEN--generation.GEN--FEM.SING

“A wedding feast is peace for a generation.”

Rirpīmhe aqh’mā īřqa!-simu rirbab.

rirpīmheaqh’māīřqa!simurirbab
ɾ̼iɾ̼pymʰəaðʰmæyɹðaʔsimUɾ̼iɾ̼bab
wolf.MASC.ABS--PLkill.PERF.STATroast.DYN.IMP--3.MASC.PLdog.ABS--FEM.SING

“When the wolves have all been eaten, (you must) cook the hunting dogs.”

Izsū-sitmu hāninī aphīďū-mab rirmab.

izsūsitmuhāninīaphīďūmabrirmab
iszɯsit̪mUhæɳiɳyapʰydɯmabɾ̼iɾ̼mab
follow.IMPF.DYN--3.MASC.DU.ERGhand.DU.ERGlead.PERF.DYN-3.FEM.PL.ABSheart.FEM.SING.ABS

“Hands follow heart.” (more poetic: “The hands must start following when the heart starts to lead.”)

Mhalabmhe dő-sūxlemhe awīhū mhalabmhe dő-shūpab, mhalabmhe dő-shūpabmhe awīhū mhalabmhe dő-sūxlemhe

mhālabmhemhedő-sūxlemheawīhūmhalabmhedő-shūpabmhe
mʰæl̪abmʰəd̪ʌɳsɯθl̪emʰəawyhɯmʰal̪abmʰəd̪ʌɳsʰɯpabmʰə
sea.FEM--PLGEN-water.GEN-PLseasonal change.DYN.IND.PERFsea.FEM--PLGEN-grassland.PL-PL
mhalabmhedő-shūpabmheawīhūmhalabmhedő-sūxlemhe
mʰæl̪abmʰəd̪ʌɳsʰɯpabmʰəawyhɯmʰal̪abmʰəd̪ʌɳsɯθl̪emʰə
sea.FEM--PLGEN-grassland.PL-PLseasonal change.DYN.IND.PERFsea.FEM--PLGEN-water.GEN-PL

“Seas of grass to seas of water and back again”


I haven’t got around to translating these, but I will. Until then, enjoy these nuggets of Stone Age wisdom:

“Don’t pick it today, it will bear fruit tomorrow, and you can eat it then.”

“When walking, keep your feet on the ground.”

“Tell a lie, then tell the truth, it will be called a lie.”

“Sitting and watching will reveal the wild boar’s tricks.”

“The fish cannot reject the water.”

“It is better to hunger than to steal.”

“He who respects you, respects your stomach, too.”

“The wise child speaks idiom, not plain words.”

“Help today returned threefold tomorrow.”

“The acorn grows to the mighty oak.”

“The yam does not seek to become an oak.”

“Keep low in the grass.” (originally a hunting maxim, later an egalitarian one)

“A pack is a tribe’s best friend.”

“The dog makes the man.”

“A rolling stone gathers no moss.”

“Learned till old, lived till old, still 3/4 is not learned.”

“Proverbs fill the heart like meat fills the belly.”

“A talk without proverbs is like a stew without garlic.”

“Do not season another’s heart with proverbs when their heart tastes bitterness.”

“Many hands make light work”/”Too many cooks spoil the stew.”

“A word to the wise is enough.”/”Talk is cheap.”/”Proverbs separate the wise from the ignorant.”

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